Breaking up is hard to do, but sometimes you know that this is the right move. When you are the one who is ending the relationship this can be a very difficult step, but when this is handled the appropriate way it does not have to lead to enmity or complete destruction. What you say, and what you don't say, can make all the difference no matter how long the relationship has gone on.
First, you should make sure that your boyfriend or girlfriend is the first person to know that you're ready to move on. Discussing your plans with friends or family before you talk to your significant other may lead to resentment if they find out. There isn't some perfect time to break up, so stop waiting until the time is right and talk about it as soon as you have made the decision. Choose a neutral, public place to avoid any drama, but be sure that you are still able to have a private conversation.
Breaking up through a voicemail or text is unfair to the other person. The least you owe them is to meet with them face to face and give them an explanation for your decision. Without this meeting, it might be difficult for your ex to get over you and move on with their life. Explain to them that it was a difficult decision for you, too, and that you regret that things didn't work out between the two of you.
Don't place blame or say negative things. Just explain how you feel logically without going on for too long. Make sure that you are clear with the other person so that the other person doesn't hold on to hope of a reconciliation. This goes for you as well, so be sure that you are ready to cut off all inappropriate contact with the person as soon as you have broken up. No late night phone calls or texts and definitely no hooking up.
Make plans with friends for the evening after you have finished the conversation with your ex. This will help to keep your mind off of the break up. It's often best to do this on a weekend to give your ex some time to recover before they have to go back to work or school. However, if you know they are a person that would do better with something to keep them busy, this may not be true.
First, you should make sure that your boyfriend or girlfriend is the first person to know that you're ready to move on. Discussing your plans with friends or family before you talk to your significant other may lead to resentment if they find out. There isn't some perfect time to break up, so stop waiting until the time is right and talk about it as soon as you have made the decision. Choose a neutral, public place to avoid any drama, but be sure that you are still able to have a private conversation.
Breaking up through a voicemail or text is unfair to the other person. The least you owe them is to meet with them face to face and give them an explanation for your decision. Without this meeting, it might be difficult for your ex to get over you and move on with their life. Explain to them that it was a difficult decision for you, too, and that you regret that things didn't work out between the two of you.
Don't place blame or say negative things. Just explain how you feel logically without going on for too long. Make sure that you are clear with the other person so that the other person doesn't hold on to hope of a reconciliation. This goes for you as well, so be sure that you are ready to cut off all inappropriate contact with the person as soon as you have broken up. No late night phone calls or texts and definitely no hooking up.
Make plans with friends for the evening after you have finished the conversation with your ex. This will help to keep your mind off of the break up. It's often best to do this on a weekend to give your ex some time to recover before they have to go back to work or school. However, if you know they are a person that would do better with something to keep them busy, this may not be true.
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