There are certain people that do not have any self worth and they usually rely on others to give them a sense of identity. A codependent relationship like this is very unhealthy as it often involves the person ignoring their own mental, emotional and physical needs in order to please and gain the approval of others. Codependency is often hard to identify and treat as there is usually denial involved.
They often have difficulty with boundaries. They may have weak, blurred boundaries and feel too responsible for the feelings and problems of others. They keep trying to fix the other person and feel rejected if their advice is ignored. On the other hand their boundaries may be too rigid, preventing any real closeness. They often vacillate between being too weak or too rigid.
People-pleasing and care-taking are often used to control and manipulate others as they need them to act in a certain way to make them feel secure. Communication is no longer honest as a result. There is an unhealthy clinging as they depend on their loved ones for fulfillment instead of finding it in themselves. They often give support to their partners at the cost of their own physical, emotional and mental health.
They are afraid of being abandoned or rejected and will stay in a relationship, even if it is abusive. They actually choose a bad relationship over being alone. Low self-esteem, shame, fear of being judged or rejected and feeling trapped are common in such a relationship. Anger and resentment, depression, despair and a sense of hopelessness are other common feelings.
The codependent behavior is often supported by the partners. They cater to the fears and anxieties of the person, deluding themselves that they are helping. However, this simply serves to reinforce the negative behavior patterns. A relationship like this can be repaired but it often takes hard work. Boundaries have to be firmly established and the self respect and self worth of both parties have to be encouraged.
Codependents are often in denial and so the first step towards healing may be recognition of the problem. They need to realize that they are creating their own problems rather than blaming it on the situation or the partner. It is often very difficult for them to reach out for help because they feel shame and fear.
There are many internet sites today dedicated to dealing with this problem. They help a sufferer to identify the problem by giving all the different symptoms. There are different levels of severity and the sooner some people receive help, the more likely they are to address the problem effectively and save their relationships.
One of the best ways of dealing with this problem is for the codependent person to begin to develop self respect. However, this is easier said than done and often involves professional guidance. A problem like this can ruin lives and the sooner it is addressed the better. It starts with awareness of the problem, acceptance that it needs to change and then taking the appropriate action. Seeking professional help is important and there are many people experienced in treating such problems.
They often have difficulty with boundaries. They may have weak, blurred boundaries and feel too responsible for the feelings and problems of others. They keep trying to fix the other person and feel rejected if their advice is ignored. On the other hand their boundaries may be too rigid, preventing any real closeness. They often vacillate between being too weak or too rigid.
People-pleasing and care-taking are often used to control and manipulate others as they need them to act in a certain way to make them feel secure. Communication is no longer honest as a result. There is an unhealthy clinging as they depend on their loved ones for fulfillment instead of finding it in themselves. They often give support to their partners at the cost of their own physical, emotional and mental health.
They are afraid of being abandoned or rejected and will stay in a relationship, even if it is abusive. They actually choose a bad relationship over being alone. Low self-esteem, shame, fear of being judged or rejected and feeling trapped are common in such a relationship. Anger and resentment, depression, despair and a sense of hopelessness are other common feelings.
The codependent behavior is often supported by the partners. They cater to the fears and anxieties of the person, deluding themselves that they are helping. However, this simply serves to reinforce the negative behavior patterns. A relationship like this can be repaired but it often takes hard work. Boundaries have to be firmly established and the self respect and self worth of both parties have to be encouraged.
Codependents are often in denial and so the first step towards healing may be recognition of the problem. They need to realize that they are creating their own problems rather than blaming it on the situation or the partner. It is often very difficult for them to reach out for help because they feel shame and fear.
There are many internet sites today dedicated to dealing with this problem. They help a sufferer to identify the problem by giving all the different symptoms. There are different levels of severity and the sooner some people receive help, the more likely they are to address the problem effectively and save their relationships.
One of the best ways of dealing with this problem is for the codependent person to begin to develop self respect. However, this is easier said than done and often involves professional guidance. A problem like this can ruin lives and the sooner it is addressed the better. It starts with awareness of the problem, acceptance that it needs to change and then taking the appropriate action. Seeking professional help is important and there are many people experienced in treating such problems.
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