The Opening and what to say is the most difficult and probably the most crucial part of communicating with a new woman. Assuming you handled your approach anxiety, brushed up on your confidence and grooming, the next part is, what do you say?
Before The Game and the proliferation of pickup artists, you can probably say anything amusing and get away with it, but now women are savvy to the ways of the pickup artists and are cautious of anything that smells like a pickup. Therefore, you want to keep away from the canned pickup lines. Most Relationship gurus and pickup coaches now teach newbies to stay away from the canned approaches and advise them to build a more natural opener.
However, for the outright rookie with no idea what to say, you should pick from among the canned approaches and spin a variation on it. Keep the theme but don't go verbatim, modify the material. The book "Mating Intelligence Unleashed" says that most women prefer an indirect approach over a direct approach. However, a direct approach has the benefit because it lets the girl know your exact intentions from the beginning so no PUA games or misunderstanding. It's all personal preference so choose a couple of openers, spin it to make it seem natural, and practice, practice, practice.
Direct Openers:
Compliment her on her hair or something she's wearing or just style in general. The trick is compliment openers are to never ever compliment her on her physical beauty. "You have a wonderful energy about you." "You have a cool style." "That's an amazing purse, watch, and so on"
Excuse me, I need to tell you something... I just saw you from over there, thought you looked really nice and had to come over and say something.
Hey there, I like you. I 'd like to get to know you. Hey, What's up? Where are you going? You're adorable, are you friendly?
You guys are so cute. You have such an adorable group dynamic going on. I want to meet you guys.
Hi, my name is Joe. You look like someone I'd like to meet.
"I just had the most AMAZING day." Then tell her what happened, something cool - AND detailed. After a 10 minute talk of how excellent your life is lately, you then cap it with, "And now I met you."
Hey, I like the way you carry yourself, and you look like you might be interesting. But I need to go, so let's exchange information and continue this later on.
Hi. You look like somebody I should get to know, but I'm in a hurry right now. Still, I don't want to pass such a wonderful opportunity to meet someone like you. I'd like to see you again at a place where we could talk and get to know each other.
Indirect Openers
Are you shy? I've been standing here talking to my friend for like 10 minutes and you still haven't said hello.
C'mon it's not that bad, it's Friday evening, the songs's good, the dance floor's pumping, why aren't you up there having a great time? Don't you hate it when people do that, you're sitting here minding your own business and somebody comes up forcing you to have a good time. Like, I was at work recently standing by the coffee machine and this woman came up to me and said, "Smile, it might not happen." I was just thinking, why doesn't she mind her own business, I was minding my own. Well ... I've pretty much just killed my own conversation, so unless you have any questions for me I'll be returning to my friends."
Hey guys, help me out, I had this song stuck in my head ALL day and I can't remember who sings it. It goes, "you spin me right round baby right round like a record player right round, round round... who sings that???... I was talking to my mother earlier today and she said its Lionel Richie... but I KNOW that isn't right!
Did you know that Frowning burns more calories than smiling? But it's ok... I understand why you have to keep it on. I can see you are mid-way in your gym schedule... You clearly want to beat the other girls in your group... I will not let you beat them because using frowning to lose weight is unfair... I will make it my job in these couple of minutes to make you smile...
OMG!... did you see those two girls fighting outside? Like right outside the club... they were totally going at it; one was pulling the others' hair, and the other one drew blood with her nails. And they seemed to be fighting over this short guy; he was standing near them just totally laughing!
I'm lost... I can't find my buddies and I'm frightened... Remember when we were kids and you could just make new friends whenever you wanted... "Want to be my new friend?"
Grab a magazine, newspaper, book, item, anything, then just examine it, and turn to her and ask, "What do you think of (...)?" or "Can you believe (...)!?" or "What is your opinion about (...)?"
So do you like Justin Timberlake? Yeah he's sexy ah? You know how many girls have told me that I look exactly like Justin Timberlake?
What are you trying to find? Everyone is trying to find something, unless ... you've found it already. My name's, what's yours?
You look like you're thinking about something. What is it?
Opinion Openers:
Hey I need your opinion on something. I'm thinking of dying my hair blonde. What do you think?
Hey can I ask your opinion. I've been considering seeing (the latest chick flick) but my buddies said I would be gay if I went to see the movie. What do you think... is it ok for a guy to watch romantic movies?
Can I get your honest opinion on something ... do I look gay? Because something really funny just happened, this dude was hitting on me in another bar!?
Hey guys, I need a female opinion... we were just at Saks today, and there were all these $600 collared tee-shirts. When chicks see guys wearing $600 shirts like that, do they think its stylish or trying too hard?
Can I get your viewpoint on something. Do I look better with my glasses off (take glasses off) or with my glasses on? (put glasses on).
Hey, give me some advice: Tomorrow is mother's day and I need a present. What do you suggest? But no mama's boy presents.
What do you think about this situation? What is your opinion on that situation? Can I get a female's perspective?
Hey, I need your point of view on something. I'm going on a blind date with some woman and I am very worried about it. Is there any suggestions you can give me so I don't appear like an idiot. I don't really know how you can dress to impress or act the right way.
Before The Game and the proliferation of pickup artists, you can probably say anything amusing and get away with it, but now women are savvy to the ways of the pickup artists and are cautious of anything that smells like a pickup. Therefore, you want to keep away from the canned pickup lines. Most Relationship gurus and pickup coaches now teach newbies to stay away from the canned approaches and advise them to build a more natural opener.
However, for the outright rookie with no idea what to say, you should pick from among the canned approaches and spin a variation on it. Keep the theme but don't go verbatim, modify the material. The book "Mating Intelligence Unleashed" says that most women prefer an indirect approach over a direct approach. However, a direct approach has the benefit because it lets the girl know your exact intentions from the beginning so no PUA games or misunderstanding. It's all personal preference so choose a couple of openers, spin it to make it seem natural, and practice, practice, practice.
Direct Openers:
Compliment her on her hair or something she's wearing or just style in general. The trick is compliment openers are to never ever compliment her on her physical beauty. "You have a wonderful energy about you." "You have a cool style." "That's an amazing purse, watch, and so on"
Excuse me, I need to tell you something... I just saw you from over there, thought you looked really nice and had to come over and say something.
Hey there, I like you. I 'd like to get to know you. Hey, What's up? Where are you going? You're adorable, are you friendly?
You guys are so cute. You have such an adorable group dynamic going on. I want to meet you guys.
Hi, my name is Joe. You look like someone I'd like to meet.
"I just had the most AMAZING day." Then tell her what happened, something cool - AND detailed. After a 10 minute talk of how excellent your life is lately, you then cap it with, "And now I met you."
Hey, I like the way you carry yourself, and you look like you might be interesting. But I need to go, so let's exchange information and continue this later on.
Hi. You look like somebody I should get to know, but I'm in a hurry right now. Still, I don't want to pass such a wonderful opportunity to meet someone like you. I'd like to see you again at a place where we could talk and get to know each other.
Indirect Openers
Are you shy? I've been standing here talking to my friend for like 10 minutes and you still haven't said hello.
C'mon it's not that bad, it's Friday evening, the songs's good, the dance floor's pumping, why aren't you up there having a great time? Don't you hate it when people do that, you're sitting here minding your own business and somebody comes up forcing you to have a good time. Like, I was at work recently standing by the coffee machine and this woman came up to me and said, "Smile, it might not happen." I was just thinking, why doesn't she mind her own business, I was minding my own. Well ... I've pretty much just killed my own conversation, so unless you have any questions for me I'll be returning to my friends."
Hey guys, help me out, I had this song stuck in my head ALL day and I can't remember who sings it. It goes, "you spin me right round baby right round like a record player right round, round round... who sings that???... I was talking to my mother earlier today and she said its Lionel Richie... but I KNOW that isn't right!
Did you know that Frowning burns more calories than smiling? But it's ok... I understand why you have to keep it on. I can see you are mid-way in your gym schedule... You clearly want to beat the other girls in your group... I will not let you beat them because using frowning to lose weight is unfair... I will make it my job in these couple of minutes to make you smile...
OMG!... did you see those two girls fighting outside? Like right outside the club... they were totally going at it; one was pulling the others' hair, and the other one drew blood with her nails. And they seemed to be fighting over this short guy; he was standing near them just totally laughing!
I'm lost... I can't find my buddies and I'm frightened... Remember when we were kids and you could just make new friends whenever you wanted... "Want to be my new friend?"
Grab a magazine, newspaper, book, item, anything, then just examine it, and turn to her and ask, "What do you think of (...)?" or "Can you believe (...)!?" or "What is your opinion about (...)?"
So do you like Justin Timberlake? Yeah he's sexy ah? You know how many girls have told me that I look exactly like Justin Timberlake?
What are you trying to find? Everyone is trying to find something, unless ... you've found it already. My name's, what's yours?
You look like you're thinking about something. What is it?
Opinion Openers:
Hey I need your opinion on something. I'm thinking of dying my hair blonde. What do you think?
Hey can I ask your opinion. I've been considering seeing (the latest chick flick) but my buddies said I would be gay if I went to see the movie. What do you think... is it ok for a guy to watch romantic movies?
Can I get your honest opinion on something ... do I look gay? Because something really funny just happened, this dude was hitting on me in another bar!?
Hey guys, I need a female opinion... we were just at Saks today, and there were all these $600 collared tee-shirts. When chicks see guys wearing $600 shirts like that, do they think its stylish or trying too hard?
Can I get your viewpoint on something. Do I look better with my glasses off (take glasses off) or with my glasses on? (put glasses on).
Hey, give me some advice: Tomorrow is mother's day and I need a present. What do you suggest? But no mama's boy presents.
What do you think about this situation? What is your opinion on that situation? Can I get a female's perspective?
Hey, I need your point of view on something. I'm going on a blind date with some woman and I am very worried about it. Is there any suggestions you can give me so I don't appear like an idiot. I don't really know how you can dress to impress or act the right way.
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